Epic Non-Apology for ‘Serious Retaliation’ from Wasilla Senator

You’ll all be pleased to know that the Alaska legislature is still the best reality show on the internets. And as per history, Wasilla Republicans continue to deliver the goods.

For those of you who need a little background, I’ll try to make this as quick and painless as possible.

Senator David Wilson (R-Wasilla) was outed on the AK Landmine for committing a weird and distasteful display of vulgarity and all-around inappropriate creepiness to a well-respected high-level staffer. We’ll call her Ann Smith [not her name]. The bottom line is that Wilson was trying to get a listen to a House Majority meeting happening behind closed doors. Ann Smith stood in front of the door and told the Senator nuh-uh. Because she was doing her job. Wilson, not to be dissuaded, got in her face, and alluded to the fact he was going to record the meeting on his phone, and acted like he was going to take a picture up her skirt. He held his arm down, with the phone camera pointed where it shouldn’t have been, and got about a foot away from her at the hem level of her skirt.

This incident became known in part because there were multiple witnesses, and two of them were members of the Capitol press corps who were there in the buillding reporting for the Juneau Empire, and KTVA-TV. With the avalanche of the #MeToo movement, this incident which otherwise might have faded away, got noticed. Statements were given, an investigation happened, and a report was issued.

After the report was issued but before the public could see it, Senator Wilson decided to go rogue (Did I mention he’s an R from Wasilla?) and hold an actual press conference in Anchorage, despite the urging of the more sane members of his caucus, and Senate leadership to not do that. He was vindicated, he said! He just couldn’t wait another moment to proclaim his innocence to the world!

It was quite something. Picture everyone there with their morning coffee not knowing what to expect, cameras and reporters, and legislative staff… but none of Wilson’s staff, or support staff from the Senate Majority. It was basically David Wilson, all alone just puttin’ himself out there in front of the cameras, denying the whole thing ever happened, calling the victim a liar, the media sitting in the room fake news, and demanding the resignation of Smith’s boss. It was like Trump-lite holding a press conference without a handler. Things were said that shouldn’t have been said, and the whole thing was a slow-motion train wreck.

Sen. David Wilson (R-Wasilla) says things at his press conference.

Come on, people. I mean, who are you going to believe, the guy inviting every media outlet to come watch him say, “LIAR!” or the multiple witnesses/reporters on the scene, and the security tape from the Capitol police? Don’t believe your lyin’ eyes, sheeple!

Those of us at Wilson’s press availability were a bit gobsmacked that Wilson was delusional/foolish enough to deny repeatedly that the incident had occurred when it was ON TAPE. And we wondered if there would be any repercussions for his rambling accusations, victim blaming, and calling everyone “fake news.”

When the report was issued, it stated that Wilson had not crossed that line to the point his actions could be considered sexual/workplace harassment. I guess that would have been a few inches closer to the hem. But the report did state that he’d acted very inappropriately, and created a “no-win situation” for a staffer by being creepy and wielding the title of Senator at the same time as he was preventing her from doing her job.

Well today, the results of a different investigation were released. This one had to do with retaliation at the bizarre press conference I just mentioned. You know, like getting on TV and calling people liars when they aren’t, impugning the character of people who just want you to leave them alone, throwing around accusations at the people reporting your bad behavior that could affect their own job prospects and professional reputations, and calling for the firing of the boss of the person you aggressed.

Here’s the report courtesy of Andrew Kitchenman at KTOO on Twitter.  The conclusion speaks volumes.

The Senate Republican Majority said that they were taking this very serious case of retaliation very seriously. During a meeting of the Senate Rules Committee, it was decided Senator Wilson would have:

• Three months probation to “demonstrate that he understands the human resources policies and decorum expectations of the Alaska Senate and the entire Legislature”
• Training on what constitutes retaliation
• Travel restrictions
• To write a letter taking responsibility to the employee involved

In other words,

• He has to not be a weird, intimidating, inappropriate bully for three months. Any bets?
• He has to take a Life 101 class so he understands what “retaliation” is, and why it’s bad.
• He’s not allowed to go on junkets? Not allowed to go home? Don’t know.
• Write a letter taking responsibility… (wait for it)

The staffer in question, the recipient of the letter, has released it to KTVA, and it’s everything you imagined and more. I have taken the liberty of correcting it.

Sorry about the stain. Wine and cheese had to be a part of correcting this letter, or it wasn’t going to happen.

The probation clock is ticking. Can Senator Wilson make it to the end of April without shooting himself in the foot? Stay tuned.

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