Open Thread – Eeeeeek! The Paven!
It just wouldn’t be Halloween without something really scary. This year’s winner?
Zombie Palin!
Hey, it may be the only way she ever finds any brains.
And now a special Halloween treat for your internet basket. Back in October of 2008, Mudflatter Eddie Fireplace Palin delighted us all with his poem The Paven, inspired by Edgar Alan Poe’s The Raven. I thought it might be fun to repost – just for old time’s sake, and because the notion of our might-have-been Vice President will remain terrifying regardless of how irrelevant she may be.
The Paven
Once upon a midnight dreary, dressed in my pajamas cheery,
Seeking answers to life’s mysteries, buried at the web’s very core.
While on my keyboard I was tapping, suddenly I heard a yapping,
A strange, incoherent yapping, on the porch outside my bedroom door.
“ ‘Tis but the wind,” I muttered, “Outside my bedroom door,
Only this, and nothing more.”
My eyes were red and bleary, my searches naught but futile query,
I rose, and with head in hands, paced upon the oaken floor.
Then again I heard the yapping, as if some lips were loosely flapping,
An ignorant word-salad yapping, too obnoxious to ignore.
Slowly, I turned and pulled the handle to my bedroom door,
And there sat the Paven, the woman-bird of ancient Alaskan lore.
And I beheld a sight beyond compare, at the comely Paven, I could only stare.
Her black feathered body was sleek and fair,
And upon her head was a towering coif of woven hair.
Her face was adorned with glasses, rimless and square,
And I raised my hand against the bright lipstick glare.
But more than all else, one thing caused my heart to jump:
Upon her feet were naughty red monkey pumps.
Suddenly with feathers streaming,
In flew the Paven, and perched upon my MacBook gleaming.
Joined now by this bird from yore, instantly my mind began to soar,
Grasping, reaching for the many answers that now must be in store.
But then the Paven spoke these words, which turned my joy to horror:
“Also Too” – This it spoke, and nothing more.
Presently my fear grew stronger,
Enchanted by this bird no longer.
“Bird or devil!” I shouted, “Evil unrepentant bore!
Quit thy perch upon my MacBook! Fly back to your Lake Lucille shore!”
But the Paven perched and sat, and spoke these words:
“Also Too” – This it spoke, and nothing more.
My spirit now was broken, without so much as a token
Of knowledge gained or wisdom spoken.
Never should I foolishly quest for knowledge, this I swore,
And I longed for the silence I had enjoyed before.
Instead now with me was the Paven, speaking just these words:
“Also Too” – For Evermore!
Great treats from you Muddies. Thanks.
.That is one freaky Zombie-Palin, yet, strangely, more attractive than the live one.
Here’s what I did for Halloween:
http://www.themindisaterriblething.com/2011/10/off-gassing-civil-disobedience.html
Happy Halloween everyone! I love the Pavin! Mudflatter Eddie Fireplace Palin, wherever you are…..great adaptation.
Pat, Washington state @ 9.2
I too have “friends” that don’t get it!!!!!
This “friend” sent me a clip of a young college student—with her take on the protesters on Wall Street. I told her i couldn’t bring it up. (white lie). So she proceeds to fire back with an e-mail telling me her “take” on the event.
This is what she thinks of this young woman.
“Anyway this clip was of one of the Wall Street Protestors and her interview was hilarious as she
was absolutely incoherent to the point of hilarity. You would have to have seen and heard her to
believe it. “
Bag zombies…
http://theperilsofpalins.files.wordpress.com/2011/10/img_3345.jpg?w=500&h=363
also too i want to say how much i love the Paven. thanks Eddie.
David Frum’s analysis of his own party’s challenges in 2012:
“The tea party stands for a series of propositions that don’t meet the reality test: that deficits matter more than jobs, that cutting deficits and tightening credit will accelerate economic growth, that high taxes and over-regulation are the most important reasons that growth has not revived, and that America still offers the world’s best opportunity for the poor to rise. Tea party plans call for a radical shift in the burden of taxation from the rich to the poor — and promise big reductions in government spending without touching any of the benefits of current retirees.
“If put into practice, the tea party platform is a formula for political and economic crisis.”
http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/31/opinion/frum-republican-tea-party-scenarios/index.html
Holy cow – finance demystified on one stunningly easy page:
http://delong.typepad.com/sdj/2011/10/a-note-prolegomenon-to-any-useful-discussion-of-modern-american-finance.html
“Beware of old people…”
Something to share with you from MY generation:
“We invented this damn protesting stuff. We’re back and we’re pissed off again.”
http://juanitajean.com/2011/10/31/just-because-its-halloween/
I love it – especially the picture. Even those of us who weren’t brave enough to march in the 60s protests found ways to be involved and to understand how effective a protest can be.
I can only dream that certain Libs get the courage and attitude Ms. Juanita has,there would be some rwnj getting slapped silly in a hurry.
Aaugh! I am in moderation! All it is is a link to The Christian Science Monitor! Are they now a “Troll Newspaper?” It’s a good political cartoon. Let me out!!!!!!!
I couldn’t wait for moderation so went directly over…you’re right it’s a great one!
Sorry BD, for some reason links are particularly prone to ending up in moderation. Never have figured that one out… 🙁
Take a look at who’s been dining at the federal trough:
“But away from the cameras, Cantor sometimes pulls right up to the spending trough, including the very stimulus law he panned in public. Letters obtained by Newsweek show him pressing the Transportation Department to spend nearly $3 billion in stimulus money on a high-speed-rail project—not the one he derided in Nevada, but another in his home state. “Virginia … will demonstrate that this historic investment in rail will create jobs, reduce congestion, spur economic growth and improve our environment,” says a letter he signed with other Virginia members in October 2009, cribbing President Obama’s own argument for the stimulus.
“Cantor signed several such letters, including an earlier one seeking rail funds a month after he went on national television attacking the Vegas project. He also signed a letter in October 2009 seeking $60 million to build commercial ships, some likely along Virginia’s coastline. As for his bashing of HUD, until last year he owned as much as $50,000 in preferred stock in a real-estate company that receives federal housing assistance from the department.
“As the government showdown over debt continues—the so-called congressional supercommittee negotiating cuts has been floundering for weeks—Newsweek found about five dozen of the most fiscally conservative Republicans, from Tea Party freshmen like Allen West to anti-spending presidential candidates like Rick Perry and Ron Paul, trying to gobble up the very largesse they publicly disown, in the time-honored, budget-busting tradition of bringing home the bacon for local constituents.”
http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2011/10/30/conseratives-brought-nation-to-default-ask-for-govt-handouts.html
aargh. I hope Cantor gets bad karma in his trick-and-treat bag this year…
Or an STD.
Wish I could click “like” on that one, LOL.
Next time the word salad shooter “speaks,” here’s a handy checklist in case you’re doing shots, or….or…
http://www.politicususa.com/en/14-secret-gop-words
Waiting for the GOPumpkin.
http://www.csmonitor.com/var/ezflow_site/storage/images/media/images/cartoon-images/2011/10/cartoon111031/10890727-1-eng-US/cartoon111031_full_600x400.jpg
Take a look at the way an unscrupulous “mortgage mill” law firm in upstate NY celebrated Halloween last year:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/29/opinion/what-the-costumes-reveal.html?_r=1
“That’s because a former employee of Steven J. Baum recently sent me snapshots of last year’s party. In an e-mail, she said that she wanted me to see them because they showed an appalling lack of compassion toward the homeowners — invariably poor and down on their luck — that the Baum firm had brought foreclosure proceedings against.
“When we spoke later, she added that the snapshots are an accurate representation of the firm’s mind-set. “There is this really cavalier attitude,” she said. “It doesn’t matter that people are going to lose their homes.” Nor does the firm try to help people get mortgage modifications; the pressure, always, is to foreclose. I told her I wanted to post the photos on The Times’s Web site so that readers could see them. She agreed, but asked to remain anonymous because she said she fears retaliation.”
Happy Halloween.
This story reminded me of some of the things said about Carl Paladino’s businesses last year. He seems to have the same kind of nasty attitude towards people.
That is the most insensitive and appalling thing I’ve ever seen. I posted it on facebook. I find it interesting to see which of my “friends” actually care about what is happening to other people. Not enough, I’m sorry to say.
that seems to be the pervasive attitude of right wing nut jobs towards just about everyone, other than themselves.
Wowser. A shot of her at the end of her first book tour? Yikes!
I think I am almost finished ordering Mother’s finances. I am turning everything over to her accountant tomorrow with a huge, huge sigh of relief. It is so complicated, it isn’t funny. I feel very incompetent about all the tax stuff that changes now, so am very happy that her accountant has happily agreed to take it on.
Tomorrow, I am going to paint some on the back of the house where it isn’t in public view. Himself decided that we just as well go on and have the house painted to go with the new deck. Fine by me! The deck is progressing nicely, too. Another couple of weeks and it should be finished.
I gotta ask if you have confidence in his integrity as you know from insurance agents. I realize this is absolutely none of my business,it just seems like a person can’t totally trust anyone,what so ever. On the brighter side it is good to know closure is in sight for you. It has been a very diificult year for you and your woodlands families. Tell all your animal and human friends to have a safe and happy Halloween.
I do trust him. And, he is a neighbor, so I know where he lives – just in case. He’s handled all her financial stuff for taxes for years, and is willing to carry on the day to day stuff because she is no longer able to do so. Mother was great at keeping up with her portfolios, and they worked well together.
I have missed this summer. Finally able to get down to the bottom of the woods to see what was going on there. It is funny to see it so sparse. So many trees have been cut up and hauled away. We did sell the shag bark hickory trees (anywhere from 26 to 43 inches in diameter) that fell, so that was a bit of a boost. Kept some of the wood from those trees, and found a guy to cut the rest of all the downed trees for firewood to be given away to people who need it. I can see years of fighting trash trees and brush down there for the future. I do hope our critters come back. They are missed, as are the hickory nuts!
I forgot. We are making sure to have a fox-sized entrance cut into the sheathing stuff on the side of the deck so Mama Fox can bring her babies up for the winter again, should she so choose. I hope she has another litter, and I do hope she will trust us again enough to winter here. Those kits are always so cute!
Hell can I winter there,too? I’m not foxy,but,I;m not overly mangy either.
Glad things are calming down/coming to completion for you both. I know from experience how hard it is to deal with (older) parents- and my stepmom is long distance.
Happy Halloween!
{{{{{jimzmum}}}}}
DH Happy and I ran a portable sawmill for several years here after Hurricane Ivan. I bet your hickory trees made some beautiful lumber.
I know from trash trees and brush battles, also, too.
It’s the yard-work work-out, eh?
*hoping with you that your critters come back*
As do I (the critters). I have missed summer, and have missed the critters. I am thinking that things will only go to the better. Then, I remember I haven’t been Pollyanna since grade school, but shove that thought back down!
My dad had some shagbark hickories….they are unforgettable trees..!
Yikes!
Talk about Trick or Treat!
That picture popped up and so did I…with a yelp, a shriek.
DH Happy came running to check on me, and found me giggling and just a teeny bit embarrassed.
hahahahacawcawcawCawCAW!
It’s going to be a good day
after a beautiful weekend celebrating my daddy’s 80th birthday
with family and friends in the Carolina foothills.
Here’s a not-so-startling-but-eerily-spooky picture for today:
http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/astropix.html
Ghost of the Cepheus Flare
“Spooky shapes seem to haunt this starry expanse, drifting through the night in the royal constellation Cepheus. Of course, the shapes are cosmic dust clouds faintly visible in dimly reflected starlight. Far from your own neighborhood on planet Earth, they lurk at the edge of the Cepheus Flare molecular cloud complex some 1,200 light-years away. … if the spooky shapes could talk, they might well wish you a happy Halloween.”
happy haunting!
thatcrowwoman
if those ghostly shapes could talk,I would ask them about the origins of the Universe and whether there are limits to space and I really want to know what’s out there. Beautiful images,thank you muchly.
I got really distracted when I clicked on that link. I started looking at all the others from NASA and ended up spending over 30 minutes looking at the stars. Time well spent, actually. I like this one for Halloween, even though it was earlier this month. The best part is that they can’t explain why this sunrise in Argentina is so strange looking – ooooo, spooky:
http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap111010.html
I don’t know…they don’t seem too spooky to me. Looks more like they’re dancin’ up a storm at some cosmic party!
ARGHHHHHH!!!!!! scared me to death! jeepers Crow you know some idiot is gonna start a new religion or somethin’.
lessee. the Church the holy Cepheus. hmmmm. ya know this might be good. i was thinking of starting a new religion. i was gonna be Righteous Reverend Mother of the whole Shebang and then become dictator of the world. humpf. with this picture i could become dictator of the whole universe and stuff.
i gotta figure out a theology that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever and i am in like Flynn.
well, then, gee, bubbles,
whatever you do
DON’T go to this link from spaceweather!!!!
http://spaceweather.com/aurora/images2011/24oct11/shawn-malone4.jpg
*insert creepy Twilight Zone music here*
{{{{{bubbles}}}}}
and
BOO!!!
also, too
🙂
dear Cepheus! yep this is gonna be good.
Beautiful..! Thank you…
She’s scary no matter how she looks. I’ve noticed that some of the news commentators are now referring to her without saying her name – the person who ran with McCain or the one who quit as governor, that sort of thing. Makes me chuckle thinking that it probably annoys the heck out of her. Perfect. 😉
Happy Halloween! Enjoy this ‘Onion’ styled piece from Slate magazine about the GOP’s war against Trick or Treaters:
“This week, Republicans in Congress have decided to take some time off from taking time off to announce a bold new jobs initiative: As part of the effort to reward the nation’s hardest working job creators, and punish the “growing mobs” of whining, entitled, spoiled youngsters who have taken to the streets with their irrational, socialist demands, House GOP Leader Eric Cantor this afternoon announced that America’s problems will be solved by a forward-thinking congressional initiative. Quoting himself in a speech that he almost gave last week, Rep. Cantor explained that “Republicans believe that what is fair is a hand up, not a hand out.” And that’s why Republicans today declared war on trick-or-treaters.”
and:
“Cain went further, explaining on Face the Nation that America’s trick-or-treaters are simply “jealous” Americans who “play the victim card” and that their childish efforts to launch a class war by intimidating the honest candied-class into giving them free things should not be rewarded. Sarah Palin, reached for comment at her home in Alaska, had yet another suggestion for America’s greedy young people. “Drill baby drill,” she hollered, explaining to Greta Van Susteren that the United States is doomed unless it can wean itself off its dependence on foreign candy, by drilling into the untapped caramel reserves of places like ANWR. Palin was immediately offered a $20 million endorsement by the Ghirardelli Chocolate Company.”
http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/low_concept/2011/10/the_republican_war_on_halloween_trick_or_treating_kids_shouldn_t.html
That was great! (Although I just don’t see Ghirardelli having anything to do with Palin.)
By the way…I think the real non-zombie Sarah Palin is a lot scarier than the zombie version.
…uuuhhh… I can’t tell the difference between the two..
They both have perpetual bad hair days.
They both have some difficulty in making both eyes track and focus on a single object.
They both have some serious need of wardrobe makeovers.
They both have an inability to produce intelligible speech.
They both display inappropriate behavior at social gatherings.
They both chew up people who get in their way.
Yup, you’re absolutely right…hard to tell them apart!
🙂 🙂 🙂
It’s easy. One is a mindless, wandering, useless creature. The other one is a zombie.
LOL. good one
It may be a sign of the times now that the republicans are losing the narrative…perhaps we’ll soon see a Ryan zombie mask on the shelves as well.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/paul-ryans-frown-should-make-democrats-smile/2011/10/30/gIQAFUWEXM_story.html?hpid=z3
Yikes, that is scary. I haven’t been seeing her on tv lately. Is her 15 minutes finally up?
Yeah she fried our brains for the last some years. Guess now she should eat them.
That pic could be made to a great chrome metal hood ornament for the front of my old crap truck. Though i like the cool moose i have now, but that’s on the nice truck.