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Sarah Palin Top Choice for Senate?!


Stay calm.

Just sit for a minute.

If you’re an Alaskan, do not start loading up the motorhome for your political asylum road trip to Canada. If you are from the Lower 48, do not stop reading here and put a big red Sharpied ‘X’ over Alaska on your desktop globe. Let me explain.

A few weeks ago, the ex-half-governor unhinged her maw, and some words fell out. Seemingly, she is considering a run for the U.S. Senate against incumbent Democrat Mark Begich. Pollsters tilted their heads to the side like a dog who hears a whistle. Then they got to work.

Public Policy Polling released some numbers today, and we all know how we love us some crunchy tasty numbers. So, grab a spoon and let’s dig in.

Alaska is one of the hot five Senate races next year. It’s a race in which a Democrat holds office in a state that voted for Mitt Romney. Think about that for a second, and you’ll understand the precarious position of red state Dems. That said, Democrats in Alaska tend to be rabidly pro-gun, pro-drilling in ANWR, and in Mark Begich’s case, pro-NDAA, pro-Stand Your Ground, and pro-offshore drilling in the Arctic. So, in the rest of the country he’s a Republican who isn’t a bigot, and likes the middle class.

OK, so those don’t exist.

Given the reality of the current state of politics and partisanship, this makes Mark Begich a strange and exotic bird, out of place no matter where he goes but with a skill set that just may allow him to survive. He’s basically like a giant ostrich in the arctic tundra, running along at top speed, leaping over marmot holes in a weird, awkward dance, just trying not to stand out and get eaten by a bear.

In addition to Begich, and Alaska’s other (comparatively) moderate Republican Senator Lisa Murkowski who is a centrist ostrich in her own party, there is a “third party” lurking in the shadows, and it’s totally screwing things up for Republicans. Who are these anti-GOP activists hell-bent on destroying the Republican Party of Alaska?

They go by the name… Republicans. The deep rift between the Constitutional-Conservative-Tea-Party-Ron-Paul wing of the Republican Party, and the Moderate-Corporatist-Centrist-Old-Guard wing of the party is developing splendidly. And the “new” Republican Party seems determined to put candidates in the primary that stand no hope of actually winning in the general election.


Then Governor Palin greets the faithful at the airport after losing the election with John McCain in 2008. Alaskans still loved her as a loser, but not as a quitter. Photo by J. Devon

36% of GOP primary voters in the state say they’d like Palin to go head-to-head against Mark Begich. I confess to being one of those people, although probably for different reasons than those polled. The evangelical Tea Party crowd, although they are a small minority in the state, still hold a torch for Palin. They’ve never read Going Rogue, but it sits on their coffee tables. They still have a faded Palin for Governor bumper sticker on their 1978 Ford pickup truck. And they’ve forgiven the unforgivable sin of abandoning Alaska, because at least she “put us on the map.” This hard-core, fringe base provides most of the voters that show up to the primaries. This is evidenced by the last Senate race in which Tea Party candidate Joe Miller won the nomination, and then got trounced by the incumbent Lisa Murkowski when she ran a successful write-in campaign against him in the general election. Yes, “Murkowski” won as a write-in candidate against the chosen nominee of the Republican Party in Alaska. This is how much the majority of Alaskans don’t like extremism, or the Tea Party.

In a hypothetical matchup for Senate, Palin actually beats Mead Treadwell, the awkward milksop Lieutenant Governor running for the seat by double digits, 36%-26%. Daniel Sullivan (the head of the Division of Natural Resources, not the Anchorage Mayor) goes down 15%, and the aforementioned former Republican Party nominee for Senate Joe Miller trails the pack with 12%.


Overseeing the Division of Elections is the Lt. Governor’s only real responsibility. Not to squander this opportunity, he sued to oppose Alaska Natives’ voter protection, and continues to love those hackable Diebold voting machines that everyone else has destroyed.

Alaskans’ wild and passionate indifference affair with Mead Treadwell is writ large in the numbers. Palin, of course, leads him strongly among those self-described as “very conservative” by 43%-20%, but she even pulls ahead 28%-25% with moderate Republicans. The former populist, reform-minded, upstart governor who had an approval rating in her state approaching 90% has fallen in esteem like a bag of dirt. She currently has a 39%-58% favorability, making her exactly as wildly popular in the state as… wait for it… Barack Obama. Independent and undeclared voters who represent more than 50% of the state’s voters overall think even less of her – 33%-64%.

Seems that Alaska doesn’t like a quitter. Even Iditarod mushers who crash into trees and break their faces finish the race.


Iditarod musher Sigrid Ekran crashed into a tree, but finished the 2007 Iditarod Sled Dog Race. She came in last, but won Rookie of the Year, and the hearts of Alaskans. Because she didn’t QUIT.

The final indignity heaped upon the steaming pile of scorn for the Quitter is that less than half of Alaskans even consider her to BE Alaskan anymore (47%) and a whopping 37% of voters in Alaska think she should run for Senate from Arizona. Ooooo. That’s gonna leave a mark.

So, what does all this mean for incumbent Democratic Senator Mark Begich?

In a matchup with Palin, Begich pulls out a victory by 52-40%, leading by 21 points with Independents 56%-35%. And Alaskans end up with the most entertaining Senate race in the nation- and a Democratic Senator. I vote for this scenario.

As it stands now, the best shot Republicans have is Lieutenant Governor Mead Treadwell and the good news for the GOP is that if Palin sits it out he, and not 2010 nominee Joe Miller, is the next choice of the party base. In a three-way primary Treadwell gets 33% to 25% for Sullivan and 24% for Miller. And in a head to head with Miller, Treadwell leads 53-30%. Even among Republican primary voters Miller has a lackluster 26-53% favorability rating.

The vapid, and tedious Lt. Governor Treadwell trails Begich 44%-40%. His favorability rating stands at 35-29% with a whopping 36% of voters still not knowing enough about him to have formed an opinion one way or the other. Wake us up when he says something.

Alaskans are closely divided when it comes to Begich with 42% approving of him, and 41% disapproving. No matter what he does, he’s got a D after his name, and in wide swaths of the state, that’s a tough sell. Even Begich has characterized himself as a “Rockefeller Republican,” but primary voters aren’t likely to vote for one of those, even if Begich were an R. He does lead Sullivan, whom nobody has ever heard of 46-39% and Joe Miller 55-32%.


Joe Miller addresses supporters at a 2010 fundraiser. Photo by J. Devon

The governor’s race looks positive for Republican retention, despite faltering numbers. Governor Sean Parnell, whose positive numbers used to linger at or above 70% has lost support. Only 44% approve of his performance to 42% who disapprove. His advocacy for a giant giveaway to oil companies from the state treasury with no strings attached has raised the ire of constituents. A referendum to repeal SB21, which Parnell signed into law last month, will be on the August 2014 primary ballot. The campaign leading up to the vote will doubtless take some swipes at the already faltering Parnell.

But even still, he holds comfortable leads in hypothetical match ups with some of the most likely Democratic opponents, none of whom have tossed their hats in the ring yet. Parnell leads former lawmaker Ethan Berkowitz  51-38%, Sen. Bill Wielechowski of Anchorage 52-33%, Rep. Les Gara of Anchorage 53-33%, and Sen. Hollis French of Anchorage by 54-33%. No numbers were taken for former U.S. Senate candidate Scott McAdams of Sitka, who finished up the Senate race against Murkowski and Miller in 2010 as everyone’s second choice, and with high favorability ratings across the board.


Governor Sean Parnell does something useful, and serves hotdogs at the Governor’s Picnic in Anchorage. Photo by J. Devon

Parnell looks strong against a primary challenge from former gubernatorial candidate Bill Walker, currently leading him 60-22%. Walker, an oil and gas man, has been outspoken against Parnell’s oil industry giveaway, and that race may tighten during the coming year as the ballot initiative figures prominently in political discussion and analysis. Even though the repeal appears poised to gain traction and support, Parnell’s opponents on both sides of the aisle have much work to do, and results will hinge on how effectively they are able to tie him to SB21 when and if it goes down in flames.

And then, there’s Alaska’s one and only Congressman, Don Young, the seemingly invincible. He’s the uncle that makes you cringe at the Thanksgiving table; the man that nobody every admits voting for; the one who lost his first election to a dead man and yet has wiped the floor with candidate, after candidate, after candidate, since the beginning of time itself. He can yell at constituents, bang a walrus penis bone on the table while the House is in session, mock wind power, and use the term “wetbacks.” It never matters. He’s also the only man who has cleaned the clock of Sean Parnell who ran for Congress in a primary battle against Young. Parnell was famously dubbed “Captain Zero” by Young, and the name stuck. It’s not that Don Young is spectacularly popular; his approval rating is 47-43%. It’s just that nobody can beat him.

Yes, 47% of Alaskans flat out disapprove of the job Don Young is doing. But 56% will vote for him anyway against Democratic challenger Matt Moore, 56-28%. He may be an inappropriate, awkward, blustering, ignorant curmudgeon… but he’s OUR inappropriate, awkward, blustering, ignorant curmudgeon. Dammit.


Congressman Don Young in committee, mocking wind power with a propeller beanie labeled “Obama’s Energy Plan.”




63 Responses to “Sarah Palin Top Choice for Senate?!”
  1. mike from iowa says:

    My Mudpup friends-this could be your state next.

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      Sick feckers.
      I wonder if their mamas are proud of them?

      • mike from iowa says:

        Mothers would have instilled the milk of human kindness in these doofs. No moms,they hatched out on fenceposts,so rumor has it.

    • Alaska Pi says:

      We got a lot closer here than is comfortable in the last session and have 1 more session with these doofs before we can dump their buns . Yech.

  2. Mo says:

    Then there’s Ted Cruz, a smarter Palin in a suit, milking the same disgruntled baggers.

    the folks who really think the GOP has gone wobbly are the teabaggers: 53% of tea party Republicans say the party has compromised too much with Democrats.

    And teabaggers overrepresented in the Republican primary electorate, according to Pew:
    Tea Party Republicans have influence in the GOP partly because of their high level of political engagement. Overall, they make up a minority (37%) of all Republicans and Republican-leaning independents nationally. Yet this group is more likely than other GOP voters to say they always vote in primary elections; as a result they make up about half of the Republican primary electorate (49%).
    So, to sum up: In general, Republicans dislike their party, even though they vote for it. Teabaggers in particular see the party as a sinkhole of appalling squishiness — and they vote more than non-teabaggers.

    So, yeah, it’s smart for Cruz to bash his own party.

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      We’ve all got our idiots, but Ted Cruz is something special, isn’t he?

      …asked Cruz about his eligibility for the White House, which has been questioned given that he was born in Canada.

      “My mother was born in Wilmington, Delaware. She’s a U.S. citizen, so I’m a U.S. citizen,” Cruz said.

      Hey, Ted, and the rest of you Teabaggers!
      President Obama’s mother was born in Wichita, Kansas, in the heartland of rill America.
      She’s a U.S. citizen, so he’s a U.S. citizen.

      (sound of tiny little minds exploding)

  3. Carol says:

    Palin – does she even know what a US Senator’s job is? Cause she sure didn’t know what the Veep’s job was when she was running for that office. Does she know the US Senator term is for 6 years – cause 4 years was twice as long as she had an attention span for. Supposedly she has another (ghost written) book coming out and she needs to flash her name before the gullible buyers. Which with the donations to her PAC falling, maybe donors are getting smarter or just broker.
    Treadwell – Mead, hmm, isn’t that an old time alcoholic drink, fermented honey?
    Miller – hey you didn’t like him before, time has not improved him.

  4. mike from iowa says:

    From C4P-a woman posted that Palin had a 58% unfavorable rating,quit as Gov. and teased people into believing she was gonna run for office last year. The editor told this woman to keep her comments polite or she wouldn’t be commenting anymore. Apparently telling the truth to rwnj is slander. Another Palin supporter said”Using sexualized terms like “tease” to describe a woman is demeaning and symbolic of the liberal’s war on women” Guess that makes WC a bad person. ROFLMAO!!

  5. It’s interesting that despite the Quitter’s political prick tease act for Begich’s seat, her fundraising for her PAC was down according to the most recent report. Maybe the gilt is finally wearing off for her hard core donors?

    • mike from iowa says:

      In farm parlance,Palin is well past the gilt stage and qualifies as a sow bordering on canning and cutting stage.(shhhh-this is between you and me,okay?)

      • benlomond2 says:

        Mikey… there are laws about not canning bad meat…. I think you’ll just have to hang it up in the smoke house and hope for the best.

  6. OMG says:

    Sarah PAC takes in about $460,000 and spends about $500,000 giving a whopping $5,000 to a candidate. The majority went to supporting the PAC and Sarah Palin from the sounds of it including SUV rentals in Washington DC and…Alaska?

  7. Zyxomma says:

    $arah who?

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      I was hoping you’d say that!
      *waving @ Zyxomma on teh high road from here on teh low(er) road*

    • Moles says:

      There are reports of her being sighted trying to attach straps to fishing floats to wear as sandals…..
      I think I’ve said this somewhere else. 🙂

  8. Mo says:

    And lest we forget what the real underlying problem is, this paragraph from Sarah Jones at PoliticusUSA is pretty choice:

    “Elect a Republican, and you are not getting that Republican – you are getting THIS group [Groundswell], and ALEC, and the Koch Brothers. You are getting a puppet, who will be manipulated and controlled by corporate interests. Naturally, their message will be crap, and so it will have to be dressed up and repackaged and sold under all kinds of shiny objects. This will necessitate a willing conservative media (check), plants in the mainstream media (check), Republican elected officials with no morals or ethics (check), corporate money to push agenda (check), and a numb electorate distracted with phony scandals and lies (check).”

    Remember, $arah “Bullseye” Palin’s campaign strategy was based upon resentment of the Republican Good Ol’ Boys Club, and she’s still milking this angle with the Teabaggers. So keep it up, $arah, please. And your supporters should continue to send you lots and lots of their money, even if they have to take out another mortgage.

  9. Diane says:

    Palin’s must need more money. Therefore, Palin’s “thinking” about running for senate, more donations to her pac.

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      Isn’t her latest PAC report due out today?
      We could have a pool re: Postage, you betcha.

      • thatcrowwoman says:

        Ding! Ding! Ding!
        $arahPAC Update:
        Many thanks, Irishgirl

        Candidate support: $5000 (Our Lady of Generosity and Progressin’ the Cause)

        Mail/Postage – $123,896 *snort*

        Consultants – $210,250 (Gee, it sure doesn’t show.)

        Speechwriting – $45,900 (Are you kidding?! Way to go, RAM. Even got an extra $8K to replace a “lost check”!)

        Fares/Travel/Lodging – $46,975

        One person’s socialism is another per$on’$ PAC, just saying.
        grifting fecking fraud

        ptui ptui ptui

        • Alaska Pi says:

          ptui ptui … Pffftt!!

          • benlomond2 says:

            Pi – look at the bright side…. with all that postage, the US Postal service will soon be back in the black, and all those Union workers will still have jobs !!

            • Alaska Pi says:

              ( ssshhh. she’ll drop the PO if she realizes there’s a union and decent pay for everyday people involved )
              lalalalalalaaa la la

            • thatcrowwoman says:

              Not so much if Postage includes Money Orders as some suspect.
              In that case, $he’$ using the USPS as her own $arahPAC laundromat.

              Think about it: support a Union vs. launder her ill-gotten grifting$.
              What would $arah Palin do?

              Anybody else picture her wringing her hands while muttering, “Out, out, damn spot!”?

              Keep scrubbing, $arah, but that stain is permanent.
              You built that.
              You betcha.

  10. Pinwheel says:

    We have gone on for so long without, I had forgotten about trolls. Good catch !! More seriously, I found the comparison, Begich-Treadwell, 44%-40% outlandish. 4 % , WTF, Who is Mead Treadwell? Back in 1968 (before this Mead guy was born) we had a campaign button: “Spiro T Who?” n

  11. Ice Gal says:

    I think that woman that was governor until she quit. I can never remember her name. She would be a fantastic senator, and do the people of Arizona proud!

  12. We will stay on our toes…..

  13. mike from iowa says:

    Isn’t Top Choice a nationally known brand of dog food?

  14. benlomond2 says:

    Run, Sarah, Run !!!

  15. OMG says:

    Maybe Alaska republicans admire someone who can win awards the way that Ms. Palin does: another “pants on fire” was recently awarded to the truth challenged woman from Wasilla, or Scottsdale, or wherever she’s hanging her hair these days:

  16. Desert's dessert says:

    not to brag, but anytime Sarah and her family are down here in Arizona, she’s takes my yoga class. Bristol and her friend have also taken it. Dislike her politics, whatever, but the woman is gracious, down to earth, and damn fit. I am jealous of her physical ability. She’s humble though when you actually talk to her. It’s sad how many small-minded people spread lies to easily.

    • Jag24 says:

      We have seen her flabby arms, fake boobs, and bizarre weight gains and losses in her face. She is neither fit nor healthy. Go back under your bridge, Little Troll.

      • Jag24 says:

        OK, we have not SEEN her fake boobs, just what appears to the the results of them. Don’t forget that we knew her up here before she went Mavericky.

    • mike from iowa says:

      When a cougar bares its fangs,does it pay to assume it is smiling? No offense to cougars.

    • Alaska Pi says:

      I haven’t laughed so hard for a long time!
      whatzername has that humble, charismatic routine down pat , doesn’t she? Ask Mr Thoma of Juneau how that all works out if she decides to get her britches in a bunch. Matter of fact, ask we Juneau Senate District constituents how we STILL feel about being deprived of a State Senator for a whole session because she got her underpants on inside out over filling our vacant seat.
      If you’re for real and not one of her minions filling up every comment section in every venue her name was mentioned in ( something we got very, very used to here) I’d advise a cold shower, stiff double shot of espresso, and some real research .
      It’s sad how many small town folks get sucked right into her shtick. That’s how we ended up with her as governor, ya know. 🙂

    • mike from iowa says:

      Mac Davis is humble,too. He wrote a song about being humble. Pretty sure he had the Snookster in mind when he recorded this,even though she had not forced herself on the world back then.

  17. Kenai Lover says:

    While there are times I wish she’d make more of her life public (very little is publicized), Im glad she doesn’t feel the need to. The fact that she’s so charitable and selfless BEHIND the curtain is admirable. And she’s still unafraid to say the things about shady democratic statements many people cannot.

    • mike from iowa says:

      Try C4P and admire the celestial star as she blazes away and misses her mark every time. Of course the misses are not her fault. Blame the lamestream media for taking her every utterance out of context. “I never said your husband has a wart on his blank. I said IT FELT like he has a wart on his blank.”

      • thatcrowwoman says:

        Morning, mikey.
        I hesitated to be the first to engage what appears to be a lost bot because, really, why bother?
        but then again, it does help me adjust my filter for the coming school year.
        (I’ve obviously got some more work to do there!)

        • mike from iowa says:

          Trust school kids have more reasoned responses besides huh-uh and he did it,too. Besides its fun to jump in the muck with Palin lovers. Tickled to death to have you jump in.

    • thatcrowwoman says:

      *ruffling feathers*

      very little is publicized???!!!???
      oh, please.

      so charitable and selfless behind the curtain?
      Prove it. Please.

      unafraid to say things…?
      as long as it’s hit and run on twitter, hiding behind facebook…
      bawk bawk chicken-hawk

      shady democratic statements?
      Be specific. Like what? and also, too, Why?

      Step away from the kool-aid, Kenai Lover.
      That stuff stunts your growth.
      …or perhaps you’re collecting “postage” …

      $arah for Senate?
      You do realize the term is six (6!) whole years, eh?

      I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:
      If anybody really loved $arah, they’d Baker Act her for her own good
      (and, yes, Quitty-britche$, that “anybody” includes you, yourself).

      $arah for Senate?

      and also, too,

      *taking a deep cleansing breath and smoothing my feathers*

    • Alaska Pi says:

      GAWD amighty!
      I haven’t laughed so hard for a long time!!!!!!!!!!!!
      People are free to say whatever they want , even MSU like whatzername does, because, see what you call lack of fear is rilly Making Shit Up, hon.
      Assuming you mean shady -(D)emocratic-statements :
      We surely do not need a Senator who goes to DC and aside from the quitting after 2 years of a six year hire, addresses “shady (D)emocratic statements ” about ANWR by running her lil phony baloney film about Section 1002 being barren and goodness what IS all the flap about. Go find it, watch it, .
      whatzername and hubby waving their arms around and saying doofus things like well, sometimes you see some caribou around here but none today foolishness. The absolute ignorance of a treaty with Canada about preserving the migration route of the Porcupine caribou herd, the fact that any kind of development of any size would cut the herd off from it’s calving ground? Oh for heaven’s sakes, that’s all “shady democratic” stuff, isn’t it?
      Wondering if you really mean “shady democratic statements” like in democracy democratic type stuff- you know, like the standard that one tiny lil group of Tea folks are not allowed to define what the rest of us are and whether we’re rill ‘mericans. Next time you and whatzername get ready to wrap yourselves up in the Constitution , go study the Shays Rebellion and the reactions of the Founding Fathers rilly rilly carefully. Different light on that Constitution, eh? 🙂

    • Dagian says:

      You’re writing about the same overpaid talentless hack who ACCEPTED that special tricycle for Trig after giving some speech rather than giving it back? Charitable and selfless?

      “Zachariah’s Way even presented Palin with a tricycle for her 2-year-old son Trig, who has Down syndrome.”

      How much money has she donated to any charity, let alone a charity that focuses upon Down’s Syndrome? I think it was $1000.00 in 2009.

      Speaking of which – is it true that Bristol posted this, “When I found out Mom was pregnant with a baby who would have Down syndrome, I confess. I was scared. I didn’t know what it would mean for his life or for ours.” and if so, doesn’t it contradict what Sarah ordered others to write about she and Todd keeping the other children unaware of it until he was born?

  18. thatcrowwoman says:

    I don’t know, Jeanne,
    I reckon I’ll stick with that bear.


    • Alaska Pi says:

      I’m with you tcw.

      • beth. says:

        Me too. And also, too. beth.

      • mike from iowa says:

        Ms Pi, Would that you go find Forest Grump and friends and explain that mikey is off limits to all bears. Soothe the savage beasties and I will find Beth and make a pilgrimage to your rain forest just as soon as I win the lottery and you assure me that I am not on the menu of forest dwellers.

        • Alaska Pi says:

          mikey- deal!!!!
          get working on winning the lottery and I’ll be waiting at the airport or the ferry terminal watching for you and Ms beth 🙂

          (oh- I can’t promise the ^%#$%&&*ing biting flies will abide by a deal so bring bug dope)

          • beth. says:

            mikey – you win the lottery and you can bet I’ll be there with Bellzon to head Ms Pi’s way with you… and damn skippy I’ll be needing some mega-strong bug dope!* Just let me know, kay? beth.

            *Bite-y and Suck-y critters just can’t seem to get enough o’ me blood — they all seem to make a bee-line (no pun intended) for me and I end up with nickel-size blisters that itch like the dickens and take weeks to heal, from their damnable bites. NOT a fan. b.

            • slipstream says:

              mike and beth — no worries. Just come visit in January. Not a mosquito to be seen; the bears are in semi-hibernation — they won’t come after you, you stay away from their dens — and very few tourists.

              Course, it might be a bit chilly.

              • beth. says:

                Advice well given — and received — slip. I had three Januarys up there but honestly don’t remember either the chill or the lack of bugs and bears in the dead of an AK winter. I don’t think tourists were even an issue during those Januarys. Or Junes. Or ever.

                ‘course that was over half-a-century ago, so I remember very little from those days. 😉

                But, yeah, when mikey hits the lottery, you can bet we’ll take your advice foremost as we prep to swoop in on Ms Pi and all- a-y’all up in the 49th. Right, mikey? beth.

              • mike from iowa says:

                Aw,do we hafta? If we go in January,we hafta stay until summer so I can see if veggies in Alaska grow as big as advertised. I figure six months is seven months more of me than Alaskans will put up with. Still haven’t heard definitive word on who is gonna ‘splain to Forest Grump that under no circumstances am I to be eaten-dead or alive. In case you missed the F.G. memo from a couple days ago,Forest Grump is the biggest,meanest grizzly ever with designs on my pastey white hide. Yikes!!!

              • benlomond2 says:

                Mikey- if ya go in January, yore pasty white hide will be perfect camo for the landscape….neither Forest Gump or the Alaskans will be able to see you, ergo… you will not wear out your welcome…. just don;t bath in the streams, as massive fish kills will alert all concerned of your presence……. 🙂

              • Alaska Pi says:

                Oh- If you come in late January or in February I can take you to watch the Leg in session!
                ‘Course the Takus could be blowing . Dang.
                Hmmm. Well, uh, hmmm.
                With the current majority, standing outside in 70mph winds getting an ice pellet facial scrub might be more relaxing…Maybe you rilly should come in the summer.
                mikey- the bears have agreed not to munch on even an itty bitty bit of you should you come visit in the summer. They have lots of spawned out salmon and berries to munch on and as much as we all love you, I hate to say you just can’t compete with dying smelly fish in the view of the bears here.
                The browns’ territory is some miles north of me- we only have blacks. They get kinda huffy about a few things but are easy to avoid.
                If you really want to see the mongo veggies, you’ll have to go to the Matanuska Valley. My Grammy is buried there- her spirit will keep you safe if whatzername is stopping by her Alaskan vacation home on Lake Loose Seal. Grammy may have only been 4’9″ but she was a master with a shotgun. She’d load it with salt and keep an eye on you should we ask.
                “course if you have Ms beth with you you’d be safe from everything- have a hunch no one or no thing messes with our Ms beth cept maybe stoopid biting bugs 😉

              • beth. says:

                Oh, Ms Pi — you’ve no idea the critters that try to mess with me! Fortunately, even though bite-y and suck-y thingies are on a coordinated mission to test me at the drop of a hat, I’m slow to anger. ‘They’ say patience is a virtue, and sometimes I feel like I’m flat running out of virtue when it comes to being messed with, but I absolutely LOVE the fact that Karma never fails to step in and ‘settle’ my scores for me. Eventually.

                The wait for it to ‘kick in’ is most delicious and watching it ‘do its thing’ is doubly so; Karma showing itself on my behalf –both for critters of the non-human and of the human variety!– borders, more oft than not, on the divine for me. Yes, I’m quite perverse that way.

                [Complete non-segue]
                My parents spent 14-years in the area — half in Whitehorse and half in Fairbanks — and had 4/5ths of their off-spring born up there. We’ve got hours and hours of movies…would love to see it in real life. With mikey and the AK pups, of course.

                My immediate family left in ’53, but I have (or had) an Uncle who was “born on the wrong side of the sheets” [as it’s euphemistically known; my grandfather was an engineer on a ship on the Yukon for years and years] in, I think, Skagway…or thereabouts. ‘t would be interesting to track him, and/or his descendants, if any, down. Scotland was his name. I’ve also a school teacher nephew up there…

                I defer, of course, to our mike in iowa as far as itinerary goes…he’s got bears to consider. I’ll just bat my eyelashes (unlike some rill Amur’cans, I can’t wink worth a darn!) and go along for what could turn out to be an incredible, wonderful, magical ride; one rivaling decades of some of the very best. It’s already truly fantastical and that, in and of itself, in my book, has been content-making and joyous enough all on its own. beth.

              • mike from iowa says:

                “I hate to say you just can’t compete the dying smelly fish in the view of the bears here,” More true romances have started with those exact words,you just wouldn’t believe how often I pick up women saying those words. You guys are sweet talking me to death,Forest Grump hasn’t a chance to bag me. I still expect to inspect the backside of every tree in the rainforest for beetles and bear sign while I’m there. Probably examine firewood,as well.After seeing some of the lovely sites in Alaska,I propose to haul Ms Beth and anyone else down to the desert to rattle the cage of my favorite storyteller par-excellence,Ms. Mag Never seen a desert or scorpion,etc.Plan to be back home in iowa in time for football season which ramps up in August.Probably drink one beer in Alaska and one in Arizona,so I can fly the airliner if necessary.

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