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December 18, 2024

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Thursday, August 3, 2023

The Quitter Returns! -

Monday, March 21, 2022

Putting the goober in gubernatorial -

Friday, January 28, 2022

Palin’s Farewell Address – Full Transcript

Sunday July 26, at 3pm Alaska time, Governor Sarah Palin stepped down from her position as governor.  This is the transcript of her farewell address. Yup, I took one for the team. It took three hours, but I made it. I’d been meaning to transcribe her rambling crazy “I’m not quitting, I’m just leading in another direction” lakeside babble-fest, but I never seemed to get around to it. And as crazy and rambling as that one was, I think this one is even better. Boots on the ground from Fairbanks coming soon! *************************** What an absolutely beautiful day it is,…

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Sarah Palin – On to a “Higher Calling”

    It’s Quittin’ Time here in Alaska.  Yes, according to our almost former executive-in-chief, we’re yesterdays news.  Tossed like an old banana peel on the compost pile of past political ambition.  Cast off like an old peep-toe pump with a broken heel.  Jilted.  So, why are we so happy? It’s kind of like being dumped by someone who was really bad for you anyway.  Sure there are some hurt feelings.  Didn’t we measure up?  Weren’t we worth fighting for?  “It’s not you, it’s me?”  What does the Lower 48 have that we don’t?  Is it the money?  But, you said you…

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So Long, Sarah! Anchorage Bids Farewell to the Governor.

Well, today was the second-to-last stop on the Quitter Tour.  It was Abdication Eve here in Alaska.  Today at 2pm Alaska time, the governor will officially hand over the state, and all it’s unresolved problems to Lt. Governor Sean Parnell.  He’s known to us here as Caribou Ken, The Empty Suit, Sean Who? and Captain Zero.  What is he going to be like?  We’ll find out. I arrived at the Governor’s Picnic in what I thought would be plenty of time.  Boy was I wrong.  All available parking spaces were taken for what felt like miles around.  I found a lucky empty spot about…

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So Long, Sarah. The Governor’s Picnic in Anchorage.

Well, it was an interesting day at the zoo. And what a zoo it was! I showed up at the Governor’s picnic a little bit early, and was quite amazed at the number of people who were there to bid farewell to the soon-to-be-ex governor. The thing I hadn’t counted on, I realized as I was walking the half mile from the first open parking place to the picnic grounds, was the tourists. Flocks of Lower 48ers had shown up with big smiles and cameras waiting for their chance to say hello. Palin’s speech was, in a word, non-existant. You…

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Boots on the Ground at the Wasilla Governor’s Picnic

AKPetMom did some great “boots on the ground” video reporting from The Governor’s Picnic in Wasilla. What was on the menu? A whole lotta patriotic word salad with God bless America croutons!  (That means anything but politics) I thank everyone for coming out today on this beautiful Alaskan day. Thank you for celebrating the military, celebrating Alaska with us and our fiftieth anniversary of the state. I appreciate you, so many of you have traveled from outside of Alaska. Raise your hand if you… Look at all these tourists! I just thank you so much for being here. And of…

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Palin’s Third Party – Time to Vote.

She’s getting ready to shake the dust of this old town off her shiny black clothes, and hit the road to somewhere. What’s next for Alaska’s almost-ex-governor? Some have speculated a third party run for the presidency. Never one to pass up the opportunity for a good poll, Mudflats asked the question. Last week Mudflatters from far and wide stretched their grey matter to imagine what Sarah Palin’s third party might be called… They rose to the task submitting hundreds of entries. As usual, it was nearly impossible on this end to whittle down the list of witticisms, and cull…

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Quittin’ Time!

Hey, everyone! Not sure where you are, gentle reader, in this big wide world, but on the Last Frontier, it’s…. “Quittin’ Time!” Not “quittin time” like when you’re the governor and you say you can’t deal with people picking on you, and you really don’t want to give back gobs of ill-gotten money…the other kind! It is 5:00 on Friday.  Last day of the work week, and time for Governor Palin to take that metaphorical punch card, stick it in the slot, slam her fist on that big honkin’ button, and get the heck out of Dodge.  Or wherever she…

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Screen Door Saturday, and a Double Dose of Rallies!

If you’re in Anchorage, or within driving distance, the downtown Park Strip is the place to be on Saturday! There’s something for everyone! ********************* The Governor’s Picnic! Yes, this is it.  Anchorage’s “Screen Door” Celebration (as in, “Don’t let the screen door hit you on the way out!”) to bid adieu to the soon-to-be-ex governor and usher out the end of a very strange era that has been anything but beneficial to our state. It hasn’t even been one term, or even one year since her nomination as VP candidate, but we’ve packed in more than our share of nail…

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Hey, Alaska! Palin Thinks You’re Stoopid!

It’s interesting to seethe spin coming from the Palin camp regarding the newly discovered illegality of Palin’s legal defense fund, The Alaska Fund Trust.  Trustee Kristan Cole is spinning so hard in her panicky 3-page press release, you might as well just give her a funny hat and call her a whirling dervish. Part of the basis for the ethics complaint filed by local resident Kim Chatman, regards the provision of the Alaska Executive Branch Ethics Act that talks about “the prohibition against a public officer accepting gifts that are intended to influence the performance of official duties.” This has ruffled the feathers…

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Shoveling Through Kristan Cole’s Press Release…

Boots?  Check. Shovel?  Check. Aspirin?  Check. Flask?  Check. OK, looks like we’re ready to go on a field trip, and shovel our way through yesterday’s press release from Kristan Cole, trustee for The Alaska Fund Trust (aka Sarah Palin’s legal defense fund).  Stick with me and don’t get separated, or we may never find you in there.  It’s easy to get lost in the histrionics, the whining, and the unrelenting spin.  Ready? First off, we learn that the conclusions reached by Mr. Daniel are “unprecedented in the history of our country.”  Yes, never in 223 years and two weeks has there…

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